So Simple, So Hard...

This gov't memo from Delaware is almost laughable in its obviousness, except that, well, people still act this way! Gawker has highlights, but here's the whole thing if you want to read it:

DIVERSITY SPOTLIGHT
Spring Edition
2009
Delaware Department of Transportation
Comments you never want to make to a coworker
WORKPLACE FAUX PAS

Curiosity is natural; and with a diverse workforce, inquiring minds always want to know. How you communicate
your inquiries can keep you from offending your co-workers.
How can you go about interacting with your colleagues without putting your foot in your mouth? How do you keep
from getting the cold shoulder and creating friction in the workplace? Understanding how others are affected by
your comments will help build an inclusive and diverse work environment.

It is always better to be honest and acknowledge your unfamiliarity when you are curious about a person or a topic.

It is never inappropriate to build a better working relationship with your co-worker by getting to know them. You
can never go wrong by saying “I really don't know that much about...” or “I’m curious about this, would you be
offended if I asked you….?” People will have greater respect for you when you are sincere and admit you are
genuinely interested in learning about them.

Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender Co-workers

Employees who make the decision to “come out” are
usually apprehensive about the kinds of reaction they
will receive from colleagues.
• What did your family say?
This is personal and not an opportunity to
start gossip.
• I don’t consider you gay.
This is insensitive.
• Have you thought about getting help?
You are stereotyping, telling the person
there’s something wrong that should be
fixed.
• Never call a coworker a “fag” or “homo.”
This is derogatory, rude, and totally
insensitive.
• I didn’t need to hear that.
If you are not interested in the person’s
personal life, simply say “Thank you.”

African American Coworkers
• The “N” word
You may have heard comedians or African
Americans use the word “n*****” casually.
It is never, ever acceptable to use this word
in any context. You are asking for trouble;
leave this one alone.
• You people
Let’s just say you are asking for trouble
when you make this reference. Your focus
should be on the individual, not the race or
culture.
• Should we order fried chicken or
watermelon for you?
This is stereotyping and shows ignorance.
• You are articulate, or you speak very well.
As opposed to what? You may be implying
that most African Americans are not well
spoken or well educated. Remember a vice
presidential candidate made this mistake.
• I am not prejudiced against black people,
my neighbors are black.
You are saying it’s all right to treat people
differently because you know a few people
of the same race.

Asian Co-workers
• You must be the new IT person.
All Asians are not IT professionals.
• You speak English very well, or did you
learn to speak English in America?
You are assuming that everyone who speaks
with an accent is foreign born. The fact is
that we all speak with an accent; e.g., New
England, Southern, British, etc. The
appropriate approach should be “I’m not
familiar with your accent, may I ask where
your accent is from?”
• What’s your native language?
Don’t assume because people look
differently or speak differently that they are
not natural-born Americans or are from a
foreign country. Remember we have
military bases all over the world; and don’t
forget the Peace Corps or Fortune 500
companies with employees and families
spending the bulk of their lives overseas.
• Can you recommend a good Chinese
restaurant?
All Asians are not Chinese. Take some time
to study a world map. The world is made up
of continents with many countries, regions,
cultures, and sub-cultures. Remember the
news reports about a vice presidential
candidate who thought Africa was a country.
• Wow, you are from India! My neighbor
Ashok Shah is from India; do you know him?
Think for a minute … do you know every
American - or everyone who lives in Dover
or Wilmington?

Older Co-workers
• You know Wal Mart is hiring.
This is not funny. An older employee has
experience you could benefit from.
• When can we start planning your retirement
party?
With this kind of attitude you are creating an
unfriendly work environment.
• You are just warming that seat.
DelDOT values the contributions of all
employees regardless of age.

White Co-workers
• That’s how a typical white person acts.
You are suggesting that all white people are
the same by putting them in the same
category. The behavior may have nothing to
do with the person’s race.
• I don’t trust white people; they are all
racists.
This is stereotyping and totally
insensitive. Get to know the person or
discuss why the actions may have offended
you. Don’t generalize.
• White trailer trash.
Why would you think that referring to
someone as trash is acceptable? This is
derogatory, and should never ever be used.

Co-workers with Disabilities
• You don’t need to date; your life will be
better without a woman/man causing you
trouble.
Being disabled does not mean the person is
socially challenged.
• You don’t look disabled. Why do you have a
handicapped sticker?
The person may have a non-visible
disability.
• Never refer to a co-worker as a “retard.”
This is an insult to people with mental
disabilities.
• Never refer to a co-worker as handicapped.
Always remember person first. It’s not the
“disabled man.” It’s the man with the
disability.

Hispanic/Latino Co-workers
• You know we should send all of you back
across the border.
Don’t assume because people look
differently or speak differently that they are
not natural-born Americans. Where did
your ancestors come from?
• It is never ever acceptable to refer to a
Hispanic/Latino co-worker as a “spic”
“wetback” or “hot footer.”
This is
derogatory.
• Can you help me out with my landscaping?
Why would you assume that all
Hispanics/Latinos are landscaping experts?
• Can you recommend a good Mexican
Restaurant?
This is stereotyping and shows ignorance.
All Hispanics/Latinos are not Mexicans.